127 Hours

If I was the protagonist of this story, the film would be titled Never because that’s the point at which I’d cut off my own arm to save myself.

The Perfect Storm

I don’t even need to see this film to get convulsive shivers; the cover alone does that to me. Just look at that little boat seconds from somersaulting on the mother of all waves! I know from the cover that this film will scare me away from boats and the ocean forever, and that really, it isn’t a good idea for me to watch it at all. Which is why I watched it three times—it was really thrilling! I read the book too.

Into the Wild

What starts out as an inspiring ‘Oh, I’m totally going to move to Alaska and live off the land and hunt and gather and write in my journal all day and, oh, who cares if I don’t have any experience, I’ll be just fine!’ type film, ends with a creepy lesson as to why I should never do that.

Open Water 2: Adrift

Despite the terrible title, you should prepare to get comfortable on the edge of your seats, my friends. The moral of the story is: (a) don’t have asshole yacht-owning yuppies for friends, and (b) if you must have nautical pals, don’t go sailing with them, and, (c) if you do venture out in the asshole’s boat, put out the goddamn ladder if you all decide to go swimming at the same time.

Black Water

Why would anybody ever choose to go boating in the crocodile-infested regions of northern Australia? I’ve always found sharks to be frightening because they sometimes mistake humans for seals, but crocodiles shit all over sharks in the scary animals competition. Crocs don’t care what kind of animal you are: humans smell meaty-licious and that’s good enough for any hungry predatory killing machine.

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11 Response Comments

  • The Rhythm Method  January 14, 2011 at 11:25 am

    I am wondering if the arm that got cut off was the one with the watch – who was keeping time for this dude? I would have lost concentration for time keeping after the first day.
    Loving your blog.

    Reply
    • Torre DeRoche  January 14, 2011 at 11:37 am

      I guess you’ll have to see the movie (and suffer the subsequent trauma) to find out.

      Reply
  • George  January 14, 2011 at 3:29 pm

    Hey, really great blog post… I’ve enjoyed reading through your blog because of the great style and energy. I actually work for the CheapOair travel blog. If you’re interested, we would love to have you on as a guest blogger. Please send me an e-mail: gchristodoulou(at)cheapoair(dot)com, and I can give you more information. Looking forward to hearing from you.

    Reply
  • Dalene  January 14, 2011 at 8:31 pm

    OooH – is 127 hours a good watch or is it too excrutiating? I’ve been anxious to see it. Love this genre.

    And really loving your site! =)

    Reply
    • Torre DeRoche  January 14, 2011 at 11:07 pm

      It is awesome. Intense and horrible and beautiful and amazing. See it. It’s not that excruciating, only that one scene …

      Reply
  • Lauren  January 14, 2011 at 10:45 pm

    When we were around 7 there was a sign of a crocodile on the gate of your pool and you convinced me there was actually a croc in the pool, I think I believed you. Always good at telling stories!

    Reply
    • Torre DeRoche  January 14, 2011 at 11:06 pm

      That sign (WARNING CROCODILES!) hung on our family pool gate was there for a long time, my whole childhood. It scared a lot of people, myself included. Thank you for reminding me, I’ll add it to my list: Things to discuss in therapy.

      Reply
  • massage  January 19, 2011 at 1:21 pm

    found your site on del.icio.us today and really liked it.. i bookmarked it and will be back to check it out some more later

    Reply
  • college grants  January 20, 2011 at 6:39 pm

    Keep posting stuff like this i really like it

    Reply
  • Brian Wilson  February 4, 2011 at 2:44 am

    This website is very well written, keep up the good work!

    Reply
    • Torre DeRoche  February 21, 2011 at 12:58 pm

      Thanks, Brian!

      Reply

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